lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
