on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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