Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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