yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
