Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I'm experimenting with sincerity
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize