That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
