My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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