Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
