Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
