Nicole vs. Life
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
