btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Fuck appropriateness.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize