The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
