how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Its about making memories worth repressing
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
