): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
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