so explain again why im purple
no
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize