i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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