Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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