You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize