Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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