She is in my trunk
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
