hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Randomize
