Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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