So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Someone shattered a urinal.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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