you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
