shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
