she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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