spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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