I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
