i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
