i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
