dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
the raccoons are back...
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