omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
