Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Please don't give away my fajitas
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