We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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