ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
At least make sure they are 18
Why
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
