he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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