:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
