i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
