Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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