Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Randomize
