please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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