It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
