He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
