i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
