if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
