his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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