Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
