I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
