I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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