put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize