I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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