I just made out with a guy for $7.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You are a genius and a whore.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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