So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Randomize
